Fantasy football's loudest genius just joined your team.
Ribby is the best friend who knows every player, every stat and every box score ever printed — and he reads your real league: your roster, your wire, every opponent, your actual scoring. He's loud, he's funny, and he's right.
No card · 7 days on your own league · 18+ · US only
Your gut wants to bench the WR1 in football?! Sit down, I'm begging you. JSN is at 89 targets, 64 catches, 985 yards and 9 touchdowns through eight games — 27.5 a game — and his WORST week all year was 12.6. That's not a slump risk, that's a utility bill: it shows up every month. Seattle's a 10.5-point favorite over Arizona on Sunday, and he saw a 44% target share two weeks ago.
Real players, real 2026 lines through Week 8 (as of Nov 3, 2026). Scripted here; live on your league.
The app · real screens
This is the actual product. Not a mockup.
Photographed off the sample league on Nov 3, 2026: the dashboard with Ribby's briefing and the win read, an exact lineup optimizer, a wire that knows your league's FAAB, a trade desk that grades both sides, and the Daily desk. None of it costs a question.
An exact optimizer under your league’s scoring, the changes from the lineup you set, an alert on any starter carrying a designation, and a what-if for any add or drop.
Real screen · sample league · Nov 3, 2026
Moves to Consider ranked by what your lineup is short of, the drop named, the bye printed, and a FAAB band priced off what your league actually pays.
Real screen · sample league · Nov 3, 2026
Needle Movers searches every rival roster for the deals that move your weekly number; the builder grades any deal the same way, with the partner’s side shown.
Real screen · sample league · Nov 3, 2026
The pool with salaries and projections, the Lineup Lab, the simulator built on measured correlations, late swap off your own entries file — and a report card after every slate.
Real screen · sample league · Nov 3, 2026The player card
Every player, the whole file.
Tap any name anywhere in the app and this opens — the real card, shown here at full length for Kenneth Walker III. Where the market has him, where he ranks, what he did every week, where the ball finds him, and what the news says this morning.
Ribby Rank, ESPN and Sleeper side by side with their own numbers and dates — and where he ranks against every qualified player at his position under YOUR scoring.
The weekly log with the bye drawn as a gap, snap and target share from the official counts, and the boom-or-bust bands around his own median.
The target map by location and depth, the red-zone strip, this season’s line by category, and the schedule ahead as a heat map.
League percentiles that name their population, his previous seasons re-scored under your settings, and the newest headline about him with the outlet named.
The real card, fully expanded, as of Nov 3, 2026. Tap any name in the app and this opens.
Seventeen games, one bye, and a five-week hole in the middle of it. Every bar is real — and the bye is drawn as a gap, not a zero, because a week he didn't play is not a week he played badly.
141 targets over 17 games · 10.2 average depth of target · 84 caught for 1,048 yards, 2 TD. Depth is air yards — where the ball was thrown, not where he ended up. A dashed cell is one he was never thrown to.
18 touches inside the 20 over 17 games — 0 carries, 18 targets, 2 touchdowns. That's 19% of everything his offense did inside the 20 in those weeks. The three bands don't overlap, so they add up — inside-the-10 is the last two.
Above: Justin Jefferson's real 2025 season from play-by-play and weekly stats, drawn by the same code the card uses · pulled 9 Sep 2026
What people use him for
Five jobs. One page each.
A real screen from the product, a conversation with real players about the job, and the one move it teaches. Pick the one you were going to do tonight anyway.
The card shows you every number. Ribby tells you which one matters this week.
See how it works → Set your lineupThe card shows the lineup. Ribby checks the injury report before you set it.
See how it works → Work the wireThe page finds the hole. Ribby tells you whether the wire can fill it — or says it can’t.
See how it works → Grade a tradeThe desk grades the deal. Ribby tells you whether the other side would actually say yes.
See how it works → Build a DFS lineupThe lab builds the lineup. Ribby builds the stack — and the desk grades itself after every slate.
See how it works →The Wire · today
Two columns a day, fact-checked before they post.
The trending story in football and the one in baseball, written in his voice from cited reporting and our own tables, and verified by a second pass before anyone reads them.
Yankees Show Interest in Alec Bohm, and the Bronx Wants a Bat
MLB.com says the Yankees are eyeing Bohm, a .249 hitter with 88 RBI, and fantasy managers get a Philly-to-Bronx daydream.
Keenan Allen Lands in San Francisco, Running on Pure Energy
Allen says the trade to a contender has him energized, but his Week 10 projections say the energy hasn't reached the box score yet.
Ask him anything
Type the question you'd text your most annoying friend.
Start/sit, waivers, trades, matchup math, bye-week panic, a roast of your own roster. He answers with your team in front of him, and every real answer ends with a call.
The moat
He sees the whole field.
A generic chatbot answers about a player. Ribby answers about your team, in your league, this week — with everything below already loaded before you finish typing.
Your roster
Every answer starts from the team you actually have — the holes, the surplus, and the guy you forgot was on IR.
Your wire
A pickup is a player you can really get, priced against what your league actually pays in FAAB. Never someone locked on another roster.
Every opponent
This week’s matchup and the whole league — who’s beatable where, who’s hoarding what you need, and who’s secretly good at 1-2.
The clock
Byes, kickoff windows, who locks at 1:00 and who covers whom. "Plays tonight" and "already played" are different answers.
Your scoring
Half-PPR, full PPR, superflex, TE premium, "every 25 passing yards" — read off your platform, never assumed, never a stat you don’t count.
The news
Designations, practice reports and the beat writers, weighed, never a veto. A headline is reporting; a roster code is a fact.
The voice
Your best friend who happens to know every stat ever.
Loud, ridiculous, a little sarcastic the way friends are with each other, and never punching down at you. The receipts are always on the table, and every actionable answer ends with Ribby's Call — one line, on the record.
Bench JSN?! He hasn’t scored under 12.6 all year. Sit down. I’m begging you.
a Tuesday panicPittsburgh is on BYE. Warren cannot score from his couch, my guy.
the flex questionHenry’s October was 5.0, 5.9 and 14.0. He’s selling you last year’s jersey at this year’s price.
a trade offerEighty-two targets and nobody’s talking about him because the name isn’t famous yet. Golden. I will not be taking questions.
the wireThe Bengals play the 9:30 AM London game. Your Burrow stack locks before brunch!
lineup lockTwo IR players in your starting lineup is not a bold strategy. It’s a Tuesday you forgot.
set my lineup“Great question! There are many factors to consider when evaluating…”
“As an AI, I cannot predict player performance with certainty.”
“Hope this helps! Let me know if you need anything else.”
He never pitches you a player somebody else already rosters.
He never recommends on a stat your league doesn't score.
He owns his earlier calls — stood by or withdrawn in one line, never denied.
Talk the Talk
The words a scout actually uses, used the way a scout actually uses them.
One question, the whole answer
4 different shapes of answer.
Not 4 variations on a paragraph. A draft-night call gets the run that's forming. A buy-low gets the receipts. A stream gets the target share. And when he doesn't know, he says so.
Either one wins you the pick — this is a coin flip the market has already flattened. Take the back your league's scoring likes.
Bijan carries the bigger workload and the bigger receiving line; Gibbs got there on nearly twice the touchdowns. In half-PPR that's a wash — in full PPR the target volume nudges Atlanta. What I will not do is pretend there's a gap here that the numbers don't show.
Value, and the touchdowns are the whole argument. He led that room in looks all year and finished with two scores.
A third of his offense's targets and two trips to the end zone is not a skill profile, it's a coin that landed tails eleven times. The volume is the repeatable part; the end-zone luck is the part that moves.
Stop shopping for a name and shop for targets. The tight end position pays for looks, not pedigree — last year's TE1 got there on 169 of them.
Eighteen-six against ten-three is the whole position in two numbers. So on the wire I want the guy whose offense is throwing him the ball eight times a week, even if you've never heard of him, over the recognizable name catching three. With your league connected I'd tell you which of those is actually free.
No line on that one. Offensive-line availability isn't in what I read — I have the injury report for fantasy-relevant skill players, not the full 53.
What I can do is tell you what the practice report says about the guys you actually start, and flag it if a designation lands before kickoff. I'd rather say "I don't have that" than invent a snap count for you.
Real answers over real 2025 season lines, as of 9 Sep 2026. With your league connected, the names are yours.
Receipts, not vibes
Every number is real. Every call is on the record.
Ribby cites what's in our database — which is everything — and when a number genuinely isn't there, he says so instead of guessing. The same rule runs this website.
Logged the moment they're made, scored against the real result that night, across 113 slates · as of 8 Nov 2026.
Ribby Rank, ESPN and Sleeper, side by side on every card, each with its own number and date.
ESPN, Yahoo, and Sleeper — connected read-only, in about a minute, revocable whenever you like.
Every actionable answer ends with Ribby's Call. No “it depends” mush, no hedging into next week.
How it starts
Three steps. One of them is optional.
No card. The 7-day trial is 10 Ribby Tokens on your real league — a question is 1, a Daily build 3 — enough to find out whether he earns the season.
ESPN, Yahoo, and Sleeper — read-only, about a minute. Sleeper is a username. Yahoo is a button. ESPN is a bookmark and a tap.
Or skip to the dashboard and let the briefing find you. The optional step is the one where you keep setting lineups from your gut.
Bring your league
Bring him your hardest question.
Connect your league and Ribby answers with your actual roster, your actual wire and your actual matchup in front of him. Season plans start at $8.99/mo, and the 7-day trial costs exactly nothing.
Screens on this page: the sample league as of Nov 3, 2026. Chat: real 2026 lines as of Nov 3, 2026. X-ray: real 2025 season, pulled 9 Sep 2026.